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Name: Judi
Country: United States
State: Oregon
Metro: Portland
Gender: Female


Interests: Being Well, Being the best me I can be, Being prosperous. computers, ,researching, writing, hiking, gardening, cooking,eating, exercising, spirituality.
Expertise: I am a caregiver for inhome elder care. I love my work. I am a free-lance writer and I am a writer and publisher because that is what I do everyday and love doing it.
Occupation: caregiver in-home care
Industry: Other


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Member Since: 3/15/2001
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Monday, December 28, 2009

Happy New Year to all My Friends at Xanga And Facebook

I know that I will be using the Law of Attraction to make the New Year even better than last year. Hope you will too.  I am grateful for the wonderful Christmas we had. I got many nice presents and spent it with a loving family. We ate until we were so full. But we made better choices about the kind of foods we choose for the holiday this year. We followed our Norwegian  ancestors and ate lots of seafood. I had both Christmas day and Christmas eve off of work. I am going to work New Years eve and New Years day as my coworker is young and wants to go party. Hope all of you have the best New Years ever. Judi





Thursday, December 24, 2009

Merry Christmas To All

 jesus_manger_1

By bmanbronco

THE GIFT OF THE MAGI
by O. Henry


 


 

One dollar and eighty-seven cents. That was all. And sixty cents of it was in pennies. Pennies saved one and two at a time by bulldozing the grocer and the vegetable man and the butcher until one's cheeks burned with the silent imputation of parsimony that such close dealing implied. Three times Della counted it. One dollar and eighty- seven cents.

And the next day would be Christmas.

There was clearly nothing to do but flop down on the shabby little couch and howl. So Della did it. Which instigates the moral reflection that life is made up of sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating.

While the mistress of the home is gradually subsiding from the first stage to the second, take a look at the home. A furnished flat at $8 per week. It did not exactly beggar description, but it certainly had that word on the lookout for the mendicancy squad.

In the vestibule below was a letter-box into which no letter would go, and an electric button from which no mortal finger could coax a ring. Also appertaining thereunto was a card bearing the name "Mr. James Dillingham Young."

The "Dillingham" had been flung to the breeze during a former period of prosperity when its possessor was being paid $30 per week. Now, when the income was shrunk to $20, though, they were thinking seriously of contracting to a modest and unassuming D. But whenever Mr. James Dillingham Young came home and reached his flat above he was called "Jim" and greatly hugged by Mrs. James Dillingham Young, already introduced to you as Della. Which is all very good.

Della finished her cry and attended to her cheeks with the powder rag. She stood by the window and looked out dully at a gray cat walking a gray fence in a gray backyard. Tomorrow would be Christmas Day, and she had only $1.87 with which to buy Jim a present. She had been saving every penny she could for months, with this result. Twenty dollars a week doesn't go far. Expenses had been greater than she had calculated. They always are. Only $1.87 to buy a present for Jim. Her Jim. Many a happy hour she had spent planning for something nice for him. Something fine and rare and sterling--something just a little bit near to being worthy of the honor of being owned by Jim.

There was a pier-glass between the windows of the room. Perhaps you have seen a pier-glass in an $8 flat. A very thin and very agile person may, by observing his reflection in a rapid sequence of longitudinal strips, obtain a fairly accurate conception of his looks. Della, being slender, had mastered the art.

Suddenly she whirled from the window and stood before the glass. her eyes were shining brilliantly, but her face had lost its color within twenty seconds. Rapidly she pulled down her hair and let it fall to its full length.

Now, there were two possessions of the James Dillingham Youngs in which they both took a mighty pride. One was Jim's gold watch that had been his father's and his grandfather's. The other was Della's hair. Had the queen of Sheba lived in the flat across the airshaft, Della would have let her hair hang out the window some day to dry just to depreciate Her Majesty's jewels and gifts. Had King Solomon been the janitor, with all his treasures piled up in the basement, Jim would have pulled out his watch every time he passed, just to see him pluck at his beard from envy.

So now Della's beautiful hair fell about her rippling and shining like a cascade of brown waters. It reached below her knee and made itself almost a garment for her. And then she did it up again nervously and quickly. Once she faltered for a minute and stood still while a tear or two splashed on the worn red carpet.

On went her old brown jacket; on went her old brown hat. With a whirl of skirts and with the brilliant sparkle still in her eyes, she fluttered out the door and down the stairs to the street.

Where she stopped the sign read: "Mne. Sofronie. Hair Goods of All Kinds." One flight up Della ran, and collected herself, panting. Madame, large, too white, chilly, hardly looked the "Sofronie."

"Will you buy my hair?" asked Della.

"I buy hair," said Madame. "Take yer hat off and let's have a sight at the looks of it."

Down rippled the brown cascade.

"Twenty dollars," said Madame, lifting the mass with a practised hand.

"Give it to me quick," said Della.

Oh, and the next two hours tripped by on rosy wings. Forget the hashed metaphor. She was ransacking the stores for Jim's present.

She found it at last. It surely had been made for Jim and no one else. There was no other like it in any of the stores, and she had turned all of them inside out. It was a platinum fob chain simple and chaste in design, properly proclaiming its value by substance alone and not by meretricious ornamentation--as all good things should do. It was even worthy of The Watch. As soon as she saw it she knew that it must be Jim's. It was like him. Quietness and value--the description applied to both. Twenty-one dollars they took from her for it, and she hurried home with the 87 cents. With that chain on his watch Jim might be properly anxious about the time in any company. Grand as the watch was, he sometimes looked at it on the sly on account of the old leather strap that he used in place of a chain.

When Della reached home her intoxication gave way a little to prudence and reason. She got out her curling irons and lighted the gas and went to work repairing the ravages made by generosity added to love. Which is always a tremendous task, dear friends--a mammoth task.

Within forty minutes her head was covered with tiny, close-lying curls that made her look wonderfully like a truant schoolboy. She looked at her reflection in the mirror long, carefully, and critically.

"If Jim doesn't kill me," she said to herself, "before he takes a second look at me, he'll say I look like a Coney Island chorus girl. But what could I do--oh! what could I do with a dollar and eighty- seven cents?"

At 7 o'clock the coffee was made and the frying-pan was on the back of the stove hot and ready to cook the chops.

Jim was never late. Della doubled the fob chain in her hand and sat on the corner of the table near the door that he always entered. Then she heard his step on the stair away down on the first flight, and she turned white for just a moment. She had a habit for saying little silent prayer about the simplest everyday things, and now she whispered: "Please God, make him think I am still pretty."

The door opened and Jim stepped in and closed it. He looked thin and very serious. Poor fellow, he was only twenty-two--and to be burdened with a family! He needed a new overcoat and he was without gloves.

Jim stopped inside the door, as immovable as a setter at the scent of quail. His eyes were fixed upon Della, and there was an expression in them that she could not read, and it terrified her. It was not anger, nor surprise, nor disapproval, nor horror, nor any of the sentiments that she had been prepared for. He simply stared at her fixedly with that peculiar expression on his face.

Della wriggled off the table and went for him.

"Jim, darling," she cried, "don't look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold because I couldn't have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. It'll grow out again--you won't mind, will you? I just had to do it. My hair grows awfully fast. Say `Merry Christmas!' Jim, and let's be happy. You don't know what a nice-- what a beautiful, nice gift I've got for you."

"You've cut off your hair?" asked Jim, laboriously, as if he had not arrived at that patent fact yet even after the hardest mental labor.

"Cut it off and sold it," said Della. "Don't you like me just as well, anyhow? I'm me without my hair, ain't I?"

Jim looked about the room curiously.

"You say your hair is gone?" he said, with an air almost of idiocy.

"You needn't look for it," said Della. "It's sold, I tell you--sold and gone, too. It's Christmas Eve, boy. Be good to me, for it went for you. Maybe the hairs of my head were numbered," she went on with sudden serious sweetness, "but nobody could ever count my love for you. Shall I put the chops on, Jim?"

Out of his trance Jim seemed quickly to wake. He enfolded his Della. For ten seconds let us regard with discreet scrutiny some inconsequential object in the other direction. Eight dollars a week or a million a year--what is the difference? A mathematician or a wit would give you the wrong answer. The magi brought valuable gifts, but that was not among them. This dark assertion will be illuminated later on.

Jim drew a package from his overcoat pocket and threw it upon the table.

"Don't make any mistake, Dell," he said, "about me. I don't think there's anything in the way of a haircut or a shave or a shampoo that could make me like my girl any less. But if you'll unwrap that package you may see why you had me going a while at first."

White fingers and nimble tore at the string and paper. And then an ecstatic scream of joy; and then, alas! a quick feminine change to hysterical tears and wails, necessitating the immediate employment of all the comforting powers of the lord of the flat.

For there lay The Combs--the set of combs, side and back, that Della had worshipped long in a Broadway window. Beautiful combs, pure tortoise shell, with jewelled rims--just the shade to wear in the beautiful vanished hair. They were expensive combs, she knew, and her heart had simply craved and yearned over them without the least hope of possession. And now, they were hers, but the tresses that should have adorned the coveted adornments were gone.

But she hugged them to her bosom, and at length she was able to look up with dim eyes and a smile and say: "My hair grows so fast, Jim!"

And them Della leaped up like a little singed cat and cried, "Oh, oh!"

Jim had not yet seen his beautiful present. She held it out to him eagerly upon her open palm. The dull precious metal seemed to flash with a reflection of her bright and ardent spirit.

"Isn't it a dandy, Jim? I hunted all over town to find it. You'll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it."

Instead of obeying, Jim tumbled down on the couch and put his hands under the back of his head and smiled.

"Dell," said he, "let's put our Christmas presents away and keep 'em a while. They're too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money to buy your combs. And now suppose you put the chops on."

The magi, as you know, were wise men--wonderfully wise men--who brought gifts to the Babe in the manger. They invented the art of giving Christmas presents. Being wise, their gifts were no doubt wise ones, possibly bearing the privilege of exchange in case of duplication. And here I have lamely related to you the uneventful chronicle of two foolish children in a flat who most unwisely sacrificed for each other the greatest treasures of their house. But in a last word to the wise of these days let it be said that of all who give gifts these two were the wisest. O all who give and receive gifts, such as they are wisest.

Everywhere they are wisest. They are the magi. 

vintage_santa_coke_commercial003

What I am grateful for today:  Good food, a warm home, my daughters and grandchildren, and the love that fills this home tonight. That as the baby Jesus is born, he born again in my heart. Thank you God for your great love of us your children. So it is, all is well, I love you all, Judi

Retro_Santa


Saturday, December 19, 2009

Saturday All Day


no photos tonight do not have the patience to wait for them.


You are all perfect and expanding; you are all adored and worthy; you are all here having your exposure to experiences and doing the best that you can from where you are. You have not been sent here in a test or trial; you're here as creators as part of an expanding Universe. You can't have it both ways. You can't have, at the root of that which you are, Well-Being, and then have that same root of Well-Being have the capacity to pronounce you evil. It is vibrationally impossible. That judging, vengeful God is manufactured from humans' place of deepest despair.

--- Abraham

Excerpted from the workshop in Fort Collins, CO on Saturday, June 19th, 2004 #288

http://www.abraham-hicks.com

My World:  Well I am looking forward to the internet to go I bought myself for Christmas.  It came but it did not work not they are sending me another one not so fast but should work out here in the country.  If not they are hooking up Mr. E. internet again. I am so glad to have something besides dialup.  If I wait long enough now I can do anything with dialup I can do at faster speeds but it is hard to wait that long. I am grateful anyway to be able to get online and talk to my friends at Xanga and facebook. I am hooked on a couple of games at facebook. I play everyday well not really because again dialup is too slow to do much at facebook.  But I play when I am home.  I answer my message from Mr. E.'s.  But I have some more new spiritual books and I am reading and reading.  Mr. E. has been sleeping a lot. They put him on a new medication and he sleeps a lot. I think part of it is depression and part the new med. 

My daughter came home today. She has been in Seattle for a week on vacation. Now I am going to be home for Christmas and Christmas Eve. Then back to work and January 2, 2010, I am going to Sedona for a week so we both got a vacation.

Everything is just wonderful in my life. I finished my Christmas shopping.  I don't buy for a lot of people. I have three daughters to buy for of course, four grandkids, and five greatgrands. But got it all done. I did a lot of it online. Only went to stores for a couple of things then I bought gift cards for most of it because otherwise have to have everyone come along and try it on.  I still have to shop for Mr. E. but will do that Monday after work.

What I am grateful for today.  I am grateful that a way opened up for me to go to Sedona.  I am grateful all the Christmas shopping is done.  I am grateful for all my bills being paid in God's own wonderful way each month.  I am grateful that none of my Christmas went on credit cards this year. I am grateful for living in the now. So it is, all is well, I love you all. Judi


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Writing Out the Problem Or Telling a New Story

 Tuesday

Good Afternoon all my friends out there.  Well, I am going to try on a little exercise given to me by Esther Hicks or Abraham the group she channels.  What I will do is talk myself up the emotional scale from an incident that I have in my own life.  What talking myself up the emotional scale will do for me is to make me have a different perspective. Just these photos of water make me feel better.  I always think of water as an emotional cleansing.

b200588920

Whenever you're trying to understand anything that is as huge as all of the Universe, or as huge as all eternity, all you have to do is bring it back to something simple that you do understand, and ask the questions and apply them. And then you can understand the Whole. Everything that's true of the Whole is true of the individual.
--- Abraham

Excerpted from the workshop in Tucson, AZ on Tuesday, February 20th, 2001

3631145342_e7702928d6

Just like you have a guidance system in your car that tells you exactly where you are one's emotions are our built in guidance system.  You can tell where you are by how you feel. Now that sounds really simple but many people this takes some work to identify there emotions. Having from a young age cut off their emotions these people have a hard time naming how they feel.  Also many times they are afraid of their emotions, "If I ever get this rage going I might kill someone with it." Or "If I ever start crying I will not be able to stop and I will go crazy." I watched a CD of Ester Hicks(as Abraham the group she channels.) working with a client the other night.  I saw her just over  talk him when he could not identify his emotions.  I am not sure she even recognize that he could not name his emotions is why he was talking about everything but emotion.  Still a third kind of client was hurt so bad at some time in their lives that they turn off emotion entirely.  This kind of client cannot tell you about his anger but neither can he reach his joy. That was the only criticism  I found in almost six books, tapes and movies I went through.

AskBook-3D DVD12-3D-t DVD13-3D DVD14-3D 3D-money-cd-120 DVD10-3D

On the Hicks website http://www.abraham-hicks.com  you can get a free introduction CD to the teachings of Abraham.

Of course your public library carries many of these books.  My library has a department where you can suggest what they buy.

405655026_3216f21564

In order to explain this a little more fully I would like to illustrate with an example of one of these types of Universal symbols...water. Water means emotion, and it has meant emotion, more often than not, for many thousands of years. The reason for this should become obvious as I show how the symbol meaning is derived within the associative functioning mechanism of the subconscious mind. Index of Dream Symbol Categories

http://www.adwizards.com/dreamers/symbolindex.htm

bc623b94-05e6-4397-95cf-6573ebc18738_300sq

Any how I am trying to change my story. Now isn't that the title of a new book by Esther Hicks well as a matter of fact it is.

Yesterday I lost my voice it happened before about three weeks ago.  I took some Claridon and lots of vitamin C and it went away telling me that it was nothing  but an allergy.  Anyway I lost my voice again yesterday. The nurse from my work called me about a doctors appointment for Mr. E. and she ask if I was sick. I said, "No, just lost my voice again."  So she told the scheduler I was sick.  In the meantime I had called my co-worker and ask him if he would trade a day with me and he said he couldn't.   So I let it go.  I wanted to attend a lecture.  So the scheduler called. "Judi, I have someone to replace you tomorrow.  I am going huh?"  But thinking I could go to the lecture I just said o.k..  Then here is where the problem came in it made me mad that my coworkers were going to the scheduler and telling her I was sick and she never even asked if I was sick.  She just replaced me.  I told her I didn't like that please ask me first before she did something like that again.  She told me I could not be sick and take things to Mr. E.  I told her I was not sick but all she heard was I was sick and she would replace anyone that was sick.  I am afraid I was petty at that point. I said," Like you replaced J. last week when he came to work with loose stool and coughing all over the place."  She said " I do not want to go back and forth with this."  I said just agree you will ask me if I am sick or wait until I ask for time off before you replace me. She said she would and I hung up.

Berry Creek Falls, Big Basin Redwoods State Park

 But, I am stuck here angry at her one more time.  Now I can change jobs I have that option open to me now. But I had better solve this problem before I leave as I have to take me with me.  Yesterday I spent about an hour writing out why I resented her and my coworker.  I decided it was because I overwork and then I am resentful when other people do not work as hard.  So I decided to slow down. To say something to my coworker about splitting up the housework at Mr. E.'s which I did.  Then this came up.   Now it is clear to me I am getting a lesson in resentment and anger.

clackamas River

So Esther Hicks says all we have to do to solve these problems is to talk to ourselves or write to ourselves moving up the emotional scale. So where I am now emotionally?  I am frustrated.

    
 Law of Attraction - Techniques
Emotional Scale
Below is one of many Law of Attraction techniques by Abraham Hicks called the Emotional Scale.
Our emotions are our built in guidance system, sort of like an internal GPS that tells us if we are connected or disconnected to our fullest self. It is an inner wisdom that is spoken to us through our emotions.

We are all born with this inner wisdom. Although, most of us have tuned it out. We have been discouraged from feeling all of our emotions.

Our emotional guidance system is an indication of how connected or disconnected we are to our "inner being". (This term inner being can be thought of in any way you'd like. For me it is my greater knowing. The SUE that is aligned fully with God. The part of me that is constantly calling me toward everything I've ever wanted.)

Notice that it is listed from highest (joy) to lowest (fear).


Joy/Knowledge/Empowerment/Freedom/Love/Appreciation
Passion
Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
Positive Expectation/Belief
Optimism
Hopefulness
Contentment
Boredom
Pessimism
*****Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
Overwhelment
Disappointment
Doubt
Worry
Blame
Discouragement
Anger
Revenge
Hatred/Rage
Jealousy
Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness
(This is one of many Law of Attraction Techniques found in the book, (Page 297) Ask and It Is Given, by Esther Hicks.)
 http://www.lawofattraction-living.com/law-of-attraction-techniques-life-coaching.html
Deschutes-smll

So as you see I am not at the bottom of the scale but sure not at joy about this either.  I do like L. scheduler.  She can be kind and fun.  I know sometimes she does not consciously set out to hurt me.  It is not a conspiracy.  I believe for some reason she is way protective shows favortism to this particular coworker of mine.  But she did not see it as interference to find someone to replace me on my shift.  She thought I was sick and she was doing her job. But she did not even check with me to see if I was sick. She, the coworker, and the nurse all were talking behind my back and decided I was sick. That was what made me mad.  But she does not see it that way.  I don't have to see it her way either but I don't care if I am right just want this problem to disappear out of my life.

Now I am Pessimistic it will change. I have been banging my head against this particular woman and the way she does things for a long time now. At least long enough to get really bored with it.  She is not going to change, neither is my coworker so how can I change myself so I do not find myself back in this place.  I feel she is disrespectful by not asking me if I was sick before replacing me.  I feel like I have to walk on egg shells when talking about my coworker as he is her baby.  I feel bored with the whole process of asking her for any kind of respect or praise for how I do things.  But I also feel trapped as long as I cannot solve this problem because like I said above I have to take me with me.  So I have to look at do I want to be special, or do I want more praise than I deserve.  I don't think so. But not just with her but with my coworker and even Mr. E. I am getting really bored. I feel I have outgrown this work.  I do not have to leave suddenly but  I need to be looking for other work.  I think I need to open my mind to other types of work.  I don't have to decide this right now I just have to each day become more open to a solution to this problem and to doing a different kind of work. 

20090317-ARZ-redrock
Sedona

Well, I have solved all I can tonight about this subject. I feel content with what I have written here. I am not a victim so I do not have to blame anyone not even myself for this problem.  Problems come with the answer always so I feel hopeful that this problem will be solved soon.  We are all people trying to do what we can to fulfill our dreams. I think admitting that I do not want to do caregiving anymore and that I have a lot of talents I can use to do something else is a very hopeful step.  I do not have to run off and quit my job. I can maybe start toward doing something else slowly.  Just to have the money to go to some spiritual retreats and think about this is a big step in the right direction.  I am going to Sedona.

2725863-2-sedona-arizona

I am grateful for this lesson.  I am appreciative of the fact I have had all these books and tapes for free. I am grateful for the public library.  I am grateful for time to read and listen. I am darn grateful I got that dirty rug out of the living room and I got the dishes done. I am grateful that my daughter is gone for a few days and I have my home to myself. I am grateful to my scheduler that she gave me almost a week off.  I am grateful I am not afraid about money.  I am grateful I can pay all my bills every month.  I am grateful that I get someone to put in the bath tub by the time I get my income tax back. So it is, all is well, I love you all, Judi
gorgeous-sedona-arizona-sunset


Saturday, December 12, 2009

Wars Against Things Cause More of The Same

 

 great spirit


"Just because the solutions of problems are not visible at any particular time does not mean that those problems will never be alleviated -- or confined to tolerable dimensions.

History has a way of changing the very terms in which problems operate and of leaving them, in the end, unsolved, to be sure, yet strangely deflated of their original meaning and importance."

Berry Creek Falls, Big Basin Redwoods State Park

 

My World:  I have been fighting with myself for two days now and I give up.  Fighting yourself or a war on poverty, a war on drugs, a war against cruelity to animals, children. We even fight an invoromental war against nature to subdue her. The Mother who created us, we fight against her as if she does not know what she is doing.  Abraham and many other great teachers have told us that whatever we resist, persists. So how do we chnage things?

We accept without doubt that we are an extension of the creator, co-creating with the source that we some call God.  I don't call her God or Goddess that has too many connatations of the old God or Goddess that will take us in the wrong direction in this new era.

 

Elowah Falls.rocks.high falls. v

The war I have been having with myself is over a co-worker.  I overwork it is a fault of mine.  Then I get resentful when others do not work as hard.  My solution if I can get to it is for me to slow down.  I have control over that behavior and to stop focusing on others. Others may not want to change their behavior and it is not my business. I am here to learn who I really am.  A child of the source, cocreating with the source.  My purpose is to learn to live joyously and then all else is added on.  When we are in an appreciative mood or a joyful, playful, fun, mood then we relax and all that we are asking for manifests.

How we can tell whether we are going in the right direction is by how we feel.  If we feel joyful, relaxed, peaceful, appreciative then we know we are going in the direction of manifesting the world we want to live in.  If we are not then we feel bad and our world reflects how we feel. 

 

Douglas-Waterfalls

If we can feel good in the middle of what we would call bad in this world of duality. Then and only then can we know who we really are and how great is our power to create.  We can create delibertly with intent or we can create at random letting our thoughts go wild. For either way the law of attraction works.  If I spend my time resenting my co-worker for what I am at fault for then I will only get more of the same.  So as I write this I see very clearly what I must do.

Elowah_01_web

What I am grateful for today.  That changing is not hard habits are sometimes just a lack of thinking.  Then we go on automatic. Thank you God this was revealed to me.  I need not fight my own habits but quiet my mind and take charge of my thoughts.  I can and do think whatever I like and create accordingly.  I am grateful for my work with Mr. E.  I am grateful for the joy and satisfaction of being out here and watching the river go by.  The meditation of my heart lets the river, the great river of life carry away all negativity. I often think when I read the 23 psalm and it says "He prepareth a table in the presence of my enemy," most of my devils and enemies are within in the form of habit.  My Mother did it this way and her mother so I do it this way. When the reason for doing that thing a certain way is forgotten and something foolish. I am grateful I live here in the richest, most abundant country in the world and that is something I created to be born here. I know many of you do not agree with me and that is alright. I only have to walk my path and follow my source. But you all are greatly loved and are an extention of source energy. All you have to do is remember. I am so sincerely appreciative that I remember most of the time. So it is, all is well, I love you all. Judi

 

Ponytail Falls, Columbia River Gorge, Oregon



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